I stare at my phone.That sentence sounds like it could be the first in a movie script or in an exciting story Im about to tell. (Potential next sentence: An urgent text message appears.)But thats not how I mean those words. Instead, I mean them as an identifying characteristic, a sentence that describes me: I work for ESPN; I play basketball; I love good coffee; I stare at my phone.Now see what I mean? Its a response to the question, So what do you like to do? How do you spend your time?Its also an admission and an embarrassingly accurate description of my nearly constant state. See me on the subway platform, head down, oblivious; or on my couch, attempting to read a book, but stopping every paragraph to refresh Twitter; or at dinner, asking a friend to repeat herself because I was reading an email; or at my desk, convincing myself Ill write after reading one more news article.Or right now, writing this, fighting the urge to Google some random factoid -- any random factoid -- to avoid the discomfort that comes with actually thinking, with actually being -- with creating instead of just absorbing. Theres long been a link between absorbing and creating (first comes one, then the other), but these days, Im rarely doing the other. Im like a sponge that never gets wrung out.The bottom line: Im concerned about the future of my brain. Im also concerned about other peoples brains -- including, potentially, yours.Theres no news hook that exists, nor one reason why readers should care about this right now, staking this storys rightful place in the news cycle. These thoughts exist not because of the news, but in spite of it. Im writing this because I need to. Its all I think about. Which means that, maybe, other people have also thought it -- even if the thought is buried beneath the rubble of text and Twitter and the endless stream of headlines.***I have long struggled with anxiety, but its usually only attached to work -- specifically to doing TV or speaking in public. Anxiety has never just buzzed inside me all day long. Usually, if a steady and persistent thought swims in my mind, I know I must sit down and write. Writing helps me process emotion. Whenever I felt confused or like I had something to say, I knew I could work through the feeling using just pen and paper.For me, deep thinking feels like going for a run. Its a kind of detox.But lately, Im feeling clumsy. The good thoughts feel farther and farther away, and if I do manage to grab one, its slippery and impossible to hold.My view used to seem expansive. Now it feels claustrophobic.And now Im feeling like I can no longer control my anxiety. Its become my companion. Perhaps the scariest part is that this endless scrolling distracts me from the anxiety, even as it feeds it.Consider the cycle: When Im lonely and anxious, instead of sitting with the feeling, trying to process it, I launch my phone in hopes of dulling the sensation. And it works -- temporarily. But Ive done nothing to cure the underlying loneliness and anxiety. So, an hour later, or a day later, the feeling will come back stronger. And how will I fix it that next time? And the time after that?I think we both know the answer.This cycle is an addiction masked as productivity, as connecting. When I was playing basketball at the University of Colorado in 2000, I didnt yet have a cell phone. And during my first year on campus, I had a reckoning of sorts: I wanted to quit and give up my scholarship. Did I even love basketball? Why was I unhappy? These thoughts swirled in my mind, without distraction, every day as I walked across campus.When I think back on that year, Im thankful that I was forced to sit in my uneasiness, process it and come out the other side, clear-eyed and committed. When muddled emotions or feelings of loss arise now, I do everything but sit with the feeling. I wonder what this kind of confusion must feel like for younger people today, who have answers at their fingertips, but perhaps not solutions.Personally, I have no excuse for letting it get this bad. The year after we published Split Image,?a story about the suicide of a student-athlete, I immersed myself in understanding how technology and social media affects us -- I actually wrote a book for Little, Brown about Madison Holleran and young people and rising rates of anxiety and depression. Its called What Made Maddy Run, and its coming out in August 2017. Heres a snippet from the books manuscript:I wrote that a year ago -- an entire year ago! While I would never spend a year drinking Mountain Dew, then puzzle at why my fitness had deteriorated, here I am, spending most days staring at my phone, reading each click-bait article and wishing I could have my brain back, wishing I could sit down and write and think the way I used to, with a kind of clarity and stamina I took for granted.The solution is obvious: spend less time on my phone. The thought of that feels promising and clear, like driving with the top down. And, simultaneously, the thought is scary. I want to hang out where everyone else is hanging out.And it seems like everyone else is in my phone.But, then again -- are they? And what version of them -- of each other -- are we getting?This is the part where Im supposed to share my detox program. Or offer my hard-won solution, followed by encouraging advice. But I dont have one. Not yet, anyway.Truth is, writing this essay was as far as I got. Stephen Curry Shoes For Sale . 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Perez, 35, posted a 1-2 record with a 3.69 earned-run average in 19 relief appearances last season. His season ended Aug. 9 due to a torn ligament in his left elbow. Perez joins infielder Andy LaRoche and catcher Mike Nickeas with minor-league agreements for 2014 that include invitations to attend spring training. RIO DE JANEIRO -- The United States mens volleyball team was so devastated by Fridays five-set semifinal loss to Italy that coach John Speraw looked as if he were sitting at a funeral rather than at the standard postmatch news conference. He sounded that way as well.Its really, really, hard. I almost feel like today we need to mourn and get it out of our system, Speraw said. I know that we will. You cant not do that. But then tomorrow morning were going to have to regroup and start mentally preparing ourselves for the next match.The next match will be for the bronze medal rather than gold, which in some ways can be a more difficult challenge than going for gold.Three-time gold medalist Kerri Walsh-Jennings said that was the case for her after she and April Ross were upset in their beach volleyball semifinal this week, and she then played for bronze for the first time in her Olympic career. Thats because as much as everyone wants to win gold, at least the loser of the championship match goes home with a silver medal. Not so in the bronze-medal match. The winner of that match takes home a medal. The loser takes home mostly regret and disappointment.The Americans already had those latter emotions hanging around their necks after Fridays loss.I dont know what to say about that, Taylor Sander said. It happens, and it happened, and it sucks.Despite losing its first two matches in this tournament, the U.S. had recovered well (including an upset of Brazil) to advance to the semifinals. And as good as the Italian team is -- Speraw says it is the favorite to win gold -- the U.S. was in position to win several times.With the large crowd loudly and enthusiastically cheering for Italy, the U.S. had a four-point lead late in the first set with five set-point opportunities to win, only to fall 30-28 to the Italians. It recovered to win a close secoond set 28-26, then blew away Italy 25-9 in the third set.dddddddddddd The U.S. also was in strong position to win the match with a 22-19 fourth-set lead, only to fail to score another point and lose 25-22.When a team loses like that in a set, youre going to get everything they have thrown back at you, Matt Anderson said of what it was like heading into the fourth set. I think we handled it well for most of that set, but there were a couple plays we could have taken care of better and taken a bigger lead and put us in a better spot.Italy then won the fifth set 15-9 in convincing fashion. While the Italians celebrated and the crowd went crazy, several of the U.S. players sat on the court stunned and teary-eyed by the loss.I thought we had so many opportunities to win this game in three or four sets, U.S. captain David Lee said. But in the big moments, the Italian team served the ball incredibly well, and that was the difference.Now the Americans have to recover and prepare for the bronze-medal match Sunday against the loser of the Russia-Brazil match. If its Brazil, the Americans will definitely have the fans roaring against them again. But they were able to draw energy from that fan excitement last week when they beat the host country and sent the crowd home much quieter. They need to do so again Sunday, or they will be so disappointed they could spend the closing ceremonies sitting and staring into space rather than marching and celebrating.I have all the faith in our guys to fight and be tough, Anderson said. Of course, there will be disappointment and setback the next couple hours. But were all in this together. Our goal was gold, and we cant have it now, so now our goal is bronze, and well take it on. Discount NFL JerseysChina Jerseys WholesaleChina NFL JerseysWholesale Jerseys From ChinaJerseys WholesaleWholesale Jerseys From ChinaCheap Nike NFL Jerseys ' ' '